Out Takes - the little mistakes famous folk would like to forget?
We all make that little verbal slip, the twist of phrase that sounds all right before it slips
from your lips. Well TV and Radio folks have their slips broadcast to millions and recorded for posterity!
Here's a few from the UK!
- "Liz Taylor is recovering in hospital after having had a benign tuna removed from just behind
her right ear."
- Capital Radio, London
- Peter Snow: "In a sense, Deng Xiaoping's death was inevitable, wasn't it?"
- Expert: "Yes."
- TV Channel 4 News
- As Phil De Glanville said, each game is unique, and this one is no different to any other."
- John Sleightholme, BBC1
- Shoemaker: "Sometimes we use French leather."
- John Eley: "Where do you get that from?"
- Shoemaker: "France!"
- BBC Radio Suffolk
- You weigh up the pros and cons and try to put them in chronological order."
- Dave Bassett, BBC Radio 5 Live
- Shane Ritchie: "What's your name?"
- Contestant: "Eva."
- Shane Ritchie: "Short for?"
- Contestant: "Eva."
- ITV (Shane Ritchie is an ex-UK games show host now appeariung in East Enders)
- If England are going to win this match, they're going to have to score a goal."
- Jimmy Hill (soccer commentator), BBC TV
- Fern Brittain: "So you're a schoolteacher. And what sort of children do you teach?"
- Contestant: "Schoolchildren."
- BBC 2
- "You could hear everyone's eyebrows going higher and higher into their foreheads."
- BBC Radio 1
- Beethoven, Kurtag, Charles Ives, Debussy - four very different names."
- Presenter, BBC Proms, Radio 3
- "It's like learning to play golf. Just when you think you've cracked it, they move the goal
- Adrian Love, Southern Counties Radio
- "Cystitis is a living death, it really is. Nobody ever talks about it, but if I was faced with
a choice between having my arms removed and getting cystitis, I'd wave good-bye to my arms quite
- Louise Wener (of Sleeper) in Q Magazine
- "...an idea someone picks up and runs with, only to find they've painted themselves into a corner."
- British Labour Party Spokesperson, BBC1
- Grand National winning jockey Mick Fitzgerald: "Sex is an anti-climax after that!"
- Desmond Lynam: "Well, you gave the horse a wonderful ride, everyone saw that."
- "Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field."
- Metro Radio
- "Morcelli has the four fastest 1500-metre times ever. And all those times are at 1500 metres."
- David Coleman, BBC1
- Listener: "My most embarrassing moment was when my artificial leg fell off at the altar
on my wedding day."
- Simon Fanshawe: "How awful! Do you still have an artificial leg?"
- Talk Radio Interview.
- "So did you see which train crashed into which train first?"
- 15-year-old: "No, they both ran into each other at the same time."
- BBC Radio 4
- "The lack of money is evident but you've got 12,000 volunteers who'll break their back to make
sure it's a success."
- ITV's Today Program (on the Paralympics)
- Presenter [to palaeontologist]: "So what would happen if you mated the woolly mammoth
with, say, an elephant?"
- Guest: "Well in the same way that a horse and a donkey produce a mule, we'd get a sort
- Presenter: "So it'd be like some sort of hairy gorilla?"
- Guest: "Er, yes, but elephant shaped, and with tusks."
- Greater London Radio
- Kilroy-Silk: "Did you mean to get pregnant?"
- Girl: "No. It was a cock-up."
- Kilroy-Silk a morning chat show host, ITV
Think you can do better? Sure you can! Why not email your joke for inclusion in our visitors section
to us at firstname.lastname@example.org. Please email jokes with your
name and state or country for publication. Please let us have you name, address and telephone number
(not for publication) and your email address indicating if you would like us to publish it with your